After All These Years

A Boy and a Dog

2012-01-14T10:40:00.004-06:00

Christmas was once again a great deal of fun in 2011. Tot was very gentle with the tree, and his love for all things animal was apparent. We are weird dog people who have ornaments for our dogs. We love the real dogs and the ornaments. Clearly, Tot is following in our footsteps. He regularly smothered the dog ornaments in kisses while the tree was still up.

Tot is completely in love with both of our dogs. One of our dogs is NOT A FAN of the small human. I am not sure that she would pay attention to him if he was wearing a diaper made of cheese. The other is a willing playmate. Obviously, Tot and she enjoy playing trains. He has even balanced a train on her back as she walked past him.

I think the biggest reason they get along so well is that their ideas are complementary. Tot enjoys placing blankets over random items to play hide-and-seek. She enjoys blankets and having them over her head (she's weird). Here, he is saying, "Sadie,[where]are you?"

Again, a complementary set of ideas. Tot enjoys hugging things he loves (people, dogs, toys, paper, really ANYthing he loves). She enjoys laying around and being loved. Plus, she is always lavished with our attention after he loves on her because she is so gentle* and sweet with him - so she gets double attention!

His love for animals expands far and wide. Just today, he was "calling" a horse in a pasture that we passed on the way to daycare. Then he "whistled" for it to "come see ME".

*Please know that we do not take her gentleness for granted. We pay attention to the dog/baby interaction and don't allow him to mess with them at all while they are eating.

To Inbinny and Be-on!

2012-01-13T10:25:00.007-06:00

Tot has a favorite toy. If the title of this post doesn't give you a big clue to who it is, I will just let you know that it's Buzz. Actually, it's "Buzz Yite-year!" Buzz is an excellent companion. Unlike the movie series, Buzz gets top billing in our house. And car. And restaurants. And books.

Buzz and Tot enjoy coloring.

Buzz is a huge fan of baked ziti.

This is Buzz's face AFTER being washed.)

And of course, Buzz still adores flying "to inbinny and be-on."

Buzz is a terrific friend for almost any occasion, but sometimes a boy needs a friend with open hands and an available thumb.

Happy New Year! May yours be filled with great friends too.

*ETA link to recipe.

Fail x3

2011-12-21T10:30:00.003-06:00

1. Yesterday, I was trying to get Tot ready for the day. He wanted to pee in the potty, but couldn’t decide which potty. He was also highly upset that I wouldn’t let him watch TV. He commenced to throwing a great fit, so I put his diaperless self into time out. He predictably and obviously peed on his bed skirt and some on the carpet.
2. Last night, I gave Tot a shower, and MH was supposed to be dressing him while I dried myself. MH thinks it’s fun to let a naked Tot goof around for a few minutes after a shower. Tot likes to hide under the comforter. MH stuck his knee in a pee spot when we got in bed last night. Tot peed on the blanket, top sheet, fitted sheet, and waterproof pad.
3.This morning, Tot's room smelled of urine, so I made MH smell the carpet where Tot peed in the morning. Nothing. When I undressed him, I noticed that his sleeper was wet. I made MH go inspect the bedding. Soaked. I guess F didn’t put the diaper on the wiggly, fun-time baby very well last night.
Hence, the THIRD load of PEE laundry in ONE DAY is currently in the washer. And we aren’t even potty training yet.

Thankful!

2011-11-30T12:39:00.003-06:00

We hosted 20 people at our house for Thanksgiving and it was great! There was too much food! We still have ample leftovers.

Most importantly, our niece's boyfriend took pictures of each family and the entire family. He got great pics in one take most of the time! As we have young ones changing so fast and older ones who won't be here forever, pictures are SO important to me. I am thankful for the time we spent and the memories captured through the lens.

I am also thankful that the incredible Dresden is hosting a giveaway at her site. I’m posting this to enter a contest offered by Check ‘n Go at Creating Motherhood! I want to win a $500 gift card! Enter to win here: http://bit.ly/plaidcash

Tot-isms

2011-11-16T11:55:00.001-06:00

When paging through a toy store magazine and seeing a rather large picture of Barbie: "Barbie poop pants. Pee-pee, too."

When I sing "yodel-ay": "hee-hoooo" (then I die).

When resisting doing something, we ask something like "Are you going to put it away, or is Mommy going to do it?": he replies "Tot DO it." and then it gets done by him. Nice.

When a show ends, he is aware that it is over. He goes to the TV, turns it off and shouts at the TV, "BYE, NEMO!" (or whatever show he is watching).

When counting, he touches each item and says, "Won, won, won, won..." Each individual item is one by itself. He counts in binary.

When we arrive at daycare everyday, he kisses his favorite silky then flings it across the car and says, "Bye Sikah. Mom, I throw Sikah HIGH!"

When he slams his Buzz.Lightyear toy against the door of my car (which he has been asked not to do), "No, Buzz. No kick door!" I appreciate that he is taking care of Buzz's kicking problem. This also slays me.

When Teen leaves, "BYE, TEEN!!!! SEE YA!"

When loving on our dogs (which he generally refers to collectively as NahlaShadie), "I hug NahlaShadie."

When rolling trucks, he intentionally crashes them, then tells on or the other, "Be nice, truck" and makes them kiss and make up..."Kiss. Wake up." (then I die, again).

He is loving and funny and mischevious and energetic and an absolute light in our lives.

Apple Pie Oatmeal in the Slow Cooker

2011-11-14T09:00:00.000-06:00

Steel cut oats have been a crockpot breakfast staple in our house since I found this recipe over at Eat At Home Cooks*. Her recipe is delicious, I have made it twice now, and we love it. Make sure to pack the brown sugar when measuring it. I doubled the spices - we like lots of flavor in our oatmeal (I also stirred in some butter at the end).

Inspired by Tiffany's recipe, I decided to try an apple version of her oatmeal. She has a similar recipe on her site, but mine is different.

Apple Pie Oatmeal in the slow cooker

Ingredients:
2.5 cups 100% apple juice
2 cups milk
1 cup steel cut oats
1 21 ounce can apple pie filling, diced, divided
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 Tbs cinnamon
1 tsp vanilla extract
4 Tbs butter (optional)

Spray slow cooker bowl with non-stick spray. I used a 2.5 quart slow cooker for this one. Anything bigger would not be ideal, as it might cook too hot. Combine the juice, milk, cinnamon, brown sugar, and vanilla in a large bowl. Add the oats and one cup of the diced pie filling. Pour this mixture into the slow cooker and cook on low overnight - at least 6 hours. Place the remaining diced apple pie filling in the refrigerator for morning.

If I happen to wake up at night, I try to remember to stir this at some point, but I don't think it is absolutely necessary.

The next morning, the mixture may look liquidy, but it won't be. It needs to be stirred well. I also take this opportunity to stir in the butter. Serve with a generous dollop of cool pie filling on top - it helps to cool it and adds a little extra sweetness.

I find that 8-10 hours is perfect for this oatmeal in my cooker. It does have a different texture than rolled oats, but it is much better, in my opinion. We always have leftovers and they reheat very well.

Tot approves!!

*I realized today that I have been cooking great things from her website for a little over a year now. Last year, this soup became a family favorite - and you can substitute turkey for the chicken if there happen to be any leftovers in your future!

The Sheets Have No Beds, The Pillows No Heads!

2011-11-13T13:25:00.004-06:00

Yesterday, I posted about decluttering the kitchen problem areas last weekend. Today is all about the laundry hot spots. Our old house had a tiny laundry room. So tiny that two people could not fit in there at a time if the dryer door was open. How on earth were we to hide all of our laundry in that tin can if company showed up?! So when we built our new house, we made sure to create an ample laundry room. Perhaps we should have also considered a sizeable living room and linen closet, but that is another story, and at least we can hide the laundry!! We keep guest sheets, old towels, extra pillows and blankets in the laundry room in two areas. We also keep (kept!) extra and extra, extra of all of those things!

Area One:
Sheets and Towels
We have these things for valid reasons. Why we had enough for 3 households is unknown. We dry the dogs with these old, worn towels. We use these sheets for the fold-out-bed in our couch. One fold-out-bed in one couch for entertaining a maximum of two guests at a time. These are not sheets for our family's beds, those are stored elsewhere.

I made a donation pile for the FOUR queen size sheet sets and two queen size dust ruffles for which there is no home out of the FOUR beds in this house. Full disclosure: at the time this picture was taken, this was actually two full sets and two half sets, but I didn't even notice that until later.

Area Two:
Blankets and Pillows (and stacks of unfolded laundry) (and OH THERE'S that donation bag!)

Below the stacks of various items, there is a VERY LARGE plastic tote. That tote was purchased for the purpose of storing extra blankets and pillows. A king size pillow fits flat in this tote with plenty of room on all sides. It is not a small tote, yet the mountain atop it somehow dwarfs it!

I removed and put away all the clean laundry. I sorted through pillows and kept only four. I trashed the remaining three. Something about donated pillows skeeves me out! I discovered the other halves of the two queen sized sheet sets in the donation pile from the other area - this is how I figured out that two of the "sets" above weren't actually sets! I gathered the donation items already on here and consolidated them with the new items and put them in the garage to go into my car later. Everything I kept fit inside the tote except two blankets. One will be on Tot's bed within the next couple months (he's still in a crib), and the other needs to be stored...somewhere. These two areas took me a nearly an hour to do because I had a little helper. I probably could have finished both of these areas in under 20 minutes by myself, but they are done, and I am pleased!

Thanks again, Nony - little by little the really embarassing spots are getting fewer and farther between!

How Many Bags of Croutons Does One Family Need?

2011-11-12T14:00:00.000-06:00

Decluttering has been cluttering my mind a lot lately, so I have been decluttering spaces in order to declutter my mind in November. Last weekend, I tackled two areas in the kitchen that were driving me equally nuts!

Area One:
The Spice Cabinet

In the spice cabinet, I couldn't find anything I needed. I had items stacked here and there with no real thought to where things should go. At one time, it was organized, but that goes out the window from time to time.

I pulled everything out of the spice cabinet and found THREE jars of beef bouillon, two jars of ground coriander seed, two bags of brown sugar, and two jars of onion powder. I knew of ONE of each of those things, and specifically bought brown sugar and bouillon last week because I thought we were out. Oops. I consolidated what I could, tossed old stuff and generally reorganized the shelves. It is much more appealing to view now!

Area Two:
The Pantry (aka Plastic Cutlery Breeding Camp)

The pantry generally stays organized, but recently, I had let it go. I didn't even know why the pitchers wouldn't fit...two more are supposed to go in this cabinet beside the two on top.

Now I know that birthday party supplies and disposable plates/napkins/cutlery of all kinds were a huge culprit. I found an entire sleeve of plastic cups that I didn't know were there. I found various themes of napkins and dessert plates. We have enough that I texted my brother and told him not to worry about bringing the cutlery and plates for Thanksgiving for 20+ people.

I found FOUR bags of croutons. Three were open. REALLY? I don't even like croutons. I did throw away a few out of date items, but mainly, I just reorganized the whole thing. There is now plenty of room on top for all the pitchers. All of the cutlery and paper goods are consolidated into one bin, and I have a spot on the bottom left open for holiday food items after I go shopping. I am very pleased with my improved spots, and hopefully, they stay neat for a little while.

This post is linked over to A Slob Comes Clean for November Decluttering Updates. Thanks, Nony, for giving me the courage to take before pictures and show them to the Internet! It doesn't feel so bad if there is a great after picture!!

Next: Laundry Storage Areas

Splashing, Climbing, Dangling

2011-11-10T09:00:00.000-06:00

He is busy and active and talkative and loving and wonderful. Two has been my favorite age so far, but I have said that about every age. Two definitely has brought some challenges, but overall, the wonder and discovery and personality outweigh the challenges.

Why was I laughing about that?

2011-11-09T09:00:00.000-06:00

To keep from crying! I recently went on a business trip to Connecticut. My male coworker (Mike) and I were scheduled to arrive Monday evening and depart Wednesday afternoon. Arrive we did. Depart we did. This is the part where I would have definitely been sobbing had I been traveling alone.

Oddly, the one flight that was on time was the Charlotte to Home flight - the last one out for the night. We arrived at that gate while the plane was still there, but the door was closed. Not.Gonna.Happen. Fortunately, our travel agency handled our lodging and further travel smoothly. Unfortunately, our toothbrushes and (more importantly) toothpaste were in our checked bags. We arrived at our hotel, and the hilarity started.
1. Mike and I stepped to the counter at the same time since our bookings had been made at the same time. Sometimes it makes things easier for the agent, sometimes it makes things awkward. This time it was awkward. The agent handed Mike 2 keys to his room and started going about her business. He said, "And my coworker needs to check in too."
2. Mike also asked about toothbrushes and toothpaste and the like since ours were checked. The agent perkily informed us that they had toothbrushes, but no toothpaste, but the convenience store "up-the-hill" would have some for sure. It was late, so we sat down for dinner then ventured out for some toothpaste. Oddly, we chose not to deposit our computer bags in our rooms first.
3. We set out for the convenience store and noticed that the hill had recently been excavated to removed some type of equiment. The only passable area to walk was a little muddy. I remarked that we needed to be very careful because we were already going to smell homeless, so we didn't need to look like it too. (Cue creepy foreshadowing music.)
4. The convenience store 'for sure' did NOT have toothpaste, so I bought gum. There was no other place in sight to procure the necessaries.
5. I also needed tampons since my extra ones were checked in my other baggage. When I asked for the tampons, the non-native English speaker looked where I pointed and started trying to hand me various packages of condoms. I could not contain my giggles, and Mike had to walk away to stifle his own. To facilitate the transaction, I said, "The BLUE box, please."
6. As Mike and I were walking back to the hotel and LAUGHING about our convenience store experience, wondering how we would explain purchasing condoms on the company card (but Boss, we were STRANDED!), I fell on the muddy hill. Karma.
7. Mike was USELESS. He was doubled over laughing. I couldn't even walk I was laughing so hard because REALLY? Did that just happen? Yes it did, and we still were not back to the hotel. I had to walk through the lobby with my muddy arse!!
8. I flung my computer bag over my shoulder and a little behind me, and Mike walked behind me. I had to keep my right hand in a fist because it was full of mud. I couldn't even relax in the elevator because it was an interior glass elevator!
9. The worst of the mud rinsed out, and the gum saved my breath. We got home safely the next day, and I remembered to take pictures.

Handsome homecoming

2011-10-26T15:15:00.004-05:00

His date wore a black and white dress with red accessories. I think he was her nicest accessory.

Concert

2011-10-12T08:47:00.001-05:00

This weekend, Tot gave an impromptu concert.
He really looks like a crooner! Occasionally, he would hand me the other end and say, "Mama, sing." Of course, I obeyed. I don't remember the last time I sang into a jump rope microphone.

Tot also touched a butterfly last week. I didn't have the camera handy, unfortunately. I do not know who was more surprised - him or the butterfly. Before this year, I never even knew that our neighbors had butterfly bushes behind their house.

Recipe Collection Redux

2011-10-11T14:00:00.002-05:00

Cooking is something I love to do. I like to try new recipes. I love food blogs, especially ones with pretty pictures. There are a couple of non-food blogs that I like to read which also happen to have a terrific recipe thrown in every so often.

I love to watch The Food Network. I print those recipes. A lot of recipes. For a few years, we only had a desktop computer at home, it was not located near the kitchen. I printed recipes from the internet. A lot of recipes. Then we got a laptop, but I don't like to have it near my workspace for fear of spilling ingredients on it. I still print recipes. A lot of recipes. Are you sensing a theme? I like printed recipes for reference, and I like to write notes on the recipes if I change something.

Several years ago, I bought a binder and some sheet protectors to organize all those recipes. It was lovely. It was full. Very full. I quickly ran out of space to organize the new recipes I collected. Every time I wanted to make a new recipe that had become a favorite, I had to go through my stack or use google if I knew the source of the specific recipe. Burdensome task, that one.

Saturday, I took advantage of waking before Tot to organize my MOUNTAIN of recipes. I found a shocking number of duplicate recipes in this process. I sorted the stack into manageable pieces: sides, salads, dips, desserts, main dishes, etc. My binder is similarly sorted. Tot woke up somewhere along this process, and I waited until his nap to flip through the binder and remove recipes that have not and never will be made. Then, I re-filled the binder with the favorites from each stack and promptly ran out of room again. BUT. BUT! I kept the stacks sorted and have a great plan to buy another binder and more protectors to finish the job. I am very happy that our new absolute favorites have a home now.

I saved the duplicates and the never mades to bring to work and share (or eventually recycle).

This morning I found a forgotten recipe in my purse and had to print a new one to try...I may need a recipe intervention...

What intervention might you need? I linked this over to A Slob Comes Clean's October Decluttering Update. Thanks, Nony, for the inspiration.

*edited to link back to A Slob Comes Clean.

Cleaning: too many words.

2011-10-10T14:59:00.001-05:00

When MH and I married years ago, the only connections that I had to the area where we lived were him and my job. MH has NEVER met a stranger - aside from the fact that we lived in the area where he was born and raised and knows everyone and their cousin's dog. "Our" friends, were HIS friends. I didn't really have any friends in the area, and I am not an outgoing person by nature*. I only had three close friends anyway (emotionally close, not geographically).

These things together meant that when MH and Teen were gone to deer camp or to the car races or anywhere without me, that I was kind of left to myself, by myself. To be clear: I absolutely cherish my alone time. But back then, I had TOO much alone time. I didn't know anyone in the area, and didn't do anything or go anywhere to meet anyone either. I played Bunco with a few girls, but only 'clicked' with one of the other eleven. I was overweight and self-conscious. I was angry at the world in general over my mom's death, and so I probably wasn't that pleasant to be around anyway. Naturally, I expected MH to fill this hole in my life. I would get angry at him for having plans with his friends and leaving me behind (even though I knew about the plans and didn't bother to make any of my own). See previous: 'wasn't that pleasant to be around'.

On weekends when Teen and MH were out living life, I was home cleaning. Part of me felt that that was what working wives/moms 'did'. Part of me used 'cleaning house' as an excuse to not leave the house. Yet another part truly wanted a presentable house in case anyone wanted to drop by (HA!!). A lot of me was resentful that THEY were out living life while I was home cleaning, even though this was mainly by my choice. It bothered me that they didn't notice immediately, and messed up my hard work even sooner. Our house was pretty clean, but I was MISERABLE.

At some point, the resentment took over (or maybe my mental health started improving??), and I quit allowing myself to feel fully responsible for our home’s cleanliness. I never allowed the kitchen or bathrooms to become disgusting, but I did allow some dust and laundry to pile up. I also let go of some of my issues regarding my way being the best way. I enlisted MH and Teen to help. I don’t mean to imply that they didn’t always help. They did and do, especially with laundry and vacuuming, but I wanted it done 'right'.

Coincidentally, our house flooded around this time. KC and her husband's house was around the corner from ours, and their house flooded too. Oddly, we bonded through that experience, and KC and BC became OUR first real friends as a couple - of course, KC and MH attended elementary and junior high together, but were not adult friends. All of a sudden, there was someone for me to hang out with on the weekends. The C's bought a house in a new subdivision, and we bought the lot across the street to build our current house.

I never felt that same 'cleanliness responsibility' that I felt in our other house. We still kept the kitchen and bathrooms clean, but everything else got done whenever it got done. Laundry was hit or miss. Prior to March 2009, Sunday was our laundry day. Since we started attending church, Sundays are incredibly busy for us, and we usually just fall into bed without much thought about the house. I even told MH that Jesus doesn’t want us to do laundry.

MH has an issue with discarding items, and we both have an amazing ability to amass clutter. Teen has this ability too, but we force his clutter to his room and shut the door. :) Clutter drives me crazy, but obviously, I must love it somewhere deep-down because I always have it around me! On more than one occasion, knowing the house would have to be cleaned was enough to convince us to host an event**.

When Tot came along, other things regarding cleanliness got worse. Sub-consciously (at first, but deliberately now), I decided that I would not miss out on fun due to being a responsible adult. HIS laundry stays done - mostly because I can fit it all in one load. The kitchen is a priority, and the bathrooms are decent. The laundry, dusting, de-cluttering, and mopping junk leaves much room for improvement. We did hire someone to do that stuff for us, but I found that the specific person we hired was not really earning the money we were paying. Also, it made me feel like a lazy failure for needing to hire someone in the first place.

I would be pretty embarrassed if someone were to drop in today, but I wouldn’t have minded Saturday. Earlier this summer, we got on a laundry kick and kept up with it for about 2 whole months – it was glorious, but we have slid a little due to not having an entire day each week to devote to laundry***. We are catching up now. I don’t like that our house is messy, but I don’t hate it either. I am determined to cherish this time in our lives, even if our house is often a mess in the process. I do feel that there must be a way to have a great memories and a mostly clean house and that cleaning shouldn’t have to be a mad dash because people will be here in five minutes!

*herewegoajen describes herself (and me).
**I seriously thought we were the only ones to do this, but as one soon learns on the Internet – that is not the case!
***A Slob Comes Clean is fantastic, and I intend to start cleaning as soon as I finish reading the entire thing from start to finish!

In my mind

2011-10-06T13:07:00.003-05:00

In 2006, I lost 50+ pounds with Weight.Watchers. I have maintained the majority of that loss, even post baby. Actually, I weigh just what I did the day I found out I was pregnant. I weigh significantly less than the day MH and I married. I wear smaller clothes than at any time in my 20s. Why is it, then, that in my brain, I still see this girl in the mirror?

In pictures, I see the difference immediately, but the mirror mocks me. Recently, I have been surprised by my own appearance in pictures because I do not FEEL as small as the person who is in the picture.
I think the answer is exercise. When I started with my weight loss, I began a walking regimen. April 2006, I was a couch potato. By June 2006, I was walking 30-45 minutes a night, 5 times per week. In March 2007, I walked a half marathon. In 2008, I jogged in more than one 5K. In early 2009, I became pregnant with Tot, and I still walked moderately, but nothing like I used to. I am far from the couch potato I used to be. I love to take Tot outside and play with him. Playing with a toddler; however, is not exactly the invigorating exercise I did prior to 2009. Exercise is amazing. When I am regularly exercising, I think more clearly, I am more patient, I am happier, I feel stronger. Why is it that I don't make the time for it anymore?

The Senior Ad

2011-10-04T08:48:00.001-05:00

Congratulations Teen! We love you, and you make us very proud!! Love, Dad, JP, and Tot

Surreal

2011-10-03T15:30:00.003-05:00

We finalized Teen's senior ad for the yearbook today. That process meant that many many photos were scoured. The differences in him, me, us, our family are surreal. We have lost grandmothers and gained a precious brother. We have watched a boy grow into a young man I hope we have all grown in the process.

Teen, you are spectacular. Your dad and I love you more than you can understand. We are so proud of the man you are becoming.

Construction of a 2

2011-09-29T08:48:00.005-05:00

For Tot's birthday party last Saturday, I selected a construction theme. There is a huge road construction project directly on our route to daycare. He is absolutely enthralled with the dump trucks and loaders and dirt. Going with this theme, I also decided to make his cake. Last year, I purchased a cupcake 'cake' and it was really cute, but I wanted to 'get my hands dirty' this year.

My inspiration for the cake came from Baked Bree. She made a super cute cake for her son's third birthday, and I wanted to achieve a similar look, but less 'clean'. I also really liked this Cars themed cake, but I absolutely didn't want a 'licensed' birthday party either. I decided to combine the two cakes into one for the cake I call "Construction of a 2."

I baked three boxed cake mixes in 9x13 inch pans. I am a cake decorating novice, and while it's isn't hard to make a cake from scratch, it's not nearly as simple as a boxed mix. I made two chocolate fudge cakes and one marble cake. Incidentally, all THREE of these cakes broke when I flipped them out of the pans. I have flipped dozens of other cakes and they did NOT break, but these cakes, which needed to be pretty eventually, broke!

I slathered milk chocolate icing on one of the chocolate cakes, then stacked(and pieced) the other chocolate cake on top. Then I frosted them with chocolate icing and dusted the entire thing with Butterfinger crumbs that I made in the food processor. I used a template from Martha.Stewart to cut a 2 out of the marble cake, then frosted it with white icing. Fatal flaw: using two different colors of icing and not wanting one to mess up the other presents a problem when it is time to move a white frosted 2 onto a Butterfinger dusted 'site'. My neighbor helped me, and we moved it in pieces, then staked it down with toothpicks. I smoothed out the icing, covered the joints, and added Reese's Pieces. Once we got the cake to the local park for the party, I added some RP filled dump trucks and loaders, candles, and Tot's name. I made the cakes the night before I wanted to work with them and took a day off work. Dealing with the structure of the cake was quite challenging and frustrating at times (see broken cakes above). The decorating part was fun and relatively easy. I am VERY happy with the way it turned out, but I have given permission to my husband and my best friend to slap me if I decide to do this* again next year.
*I've cleverly left a loophole: Of COURSE I won't do THIS again because I've already done it. I would obviously make an entirely different cake...

To Our Sweet Son

2011-09-28T09:35:00.008-05:00

Dear Son,
You are now a two-year-old. We had your birthday party last Saturday at a park, and you had a terrific time. Your grandparents, Cora, aunts, uncles, cousins and countless friends came to enjoy a very special party. Even my Aunt Joy came in for our celebration of little you. Uncle Mark didn't make it because he lives in Utah now, but he did call you. Even though you did have a lot of fun, the pictures don't really show it on your face. You are not at all impressed with a camera even though it seems like one is always around to take your picture. I can't help it; I don't want to forget a single moment of this time with you. Your dad and I laugh because neither he nor I have ever met a camera we couldn't smile for.

Physically, you are a firecracker - small but booming! You bounce and jump and run and swing and slide and climb and throw like kids who are much older than you. You can even blow your nose, which is something you have been doing since you were 14 months old. You surprised us all in mid-July by stepping onto the hearth and jumping off of it with both feet. You scare me silly because you have no fear. We took you to the lake for Independence Day and you absolutely loved being in the lake. You floated around in your life jacket and stayed in the water every minute that the adults did. Though one day I wore you out in two different swimming activities and you told me, "All done wadeh, Mama." You were tired and ready to go.

You have a small four-wheeler that you push down our driveway and coast all the way to the end. You love to roll trucks and blow bubbles and draw with chalk. Each day, when we pull in the driveway, you point to the neighbor's trampoline and say, "I jump!" Most days we do, unless it is too hot or rainy. "Ride pour" is another phrase you like to say. I am not sure if it is a statement or a question, but when you say it, you are wanting to ride the real four-wheeler. We have to take the key out and hide it because you figured out how to crank it! You have flattered several 10 year old boys from church by imitating what they do. You are quite the little physical mimic - even push-ups with your big brother.

You love your big brother. You ask for him when he isn't around. He loves you too. I suspect that anyone you've ever met loves you. You are a happy boy and you are friendly. You give the best hugs, and you wake dad and me each morning with "Hi Mama" and "Hi Dada" over the baby monitor. Dada is your favorite person, unless I'm around. You are MY BABY, and I love it that way. You have no idea how often you melt my heart. You love dogs too, though I can't say that they love you. You are pretty enthusiastic with your affection for them.

"Sika" is your small silky blanket with a monkey on it that mainly stays in the car. You exclaim, "SIKA!" each time you get into the car, and then you hug him so tightly. You also kiss him goodbye then toss him across the car when we get out of it. I am not sure if you love Sika or "Bank" more. Whenever you are in the house, you drag around a larger blue silky blanket. Your dad calls you Linus from Charlie Brown because he dragged around a blanket too. Two movies and a couple TV shows are tops in your book. Cars is your favorite, but Toy Story is a close second. You love 'Mayna' (Mater) and 'Cah-wee' (McQueen), though 'WiddyBuzz' is closing the gap. Some of your presents had either McQueen or Mater on the gift wrap, and you were so excited to see the wrap that you didn't care at all what was inside.

You love to do puzzles, and thankfully, you got a couple new ones for your birthday. Your favorite puzzle is on my iPhone. You actually put together a puzzle of a "Simon" game. A month ago, you needed a lot of help, but now you can drag all the pieces to the right places all by yourself. You also have become quite good with a matching game with eight tiles. You can often do the entire thing without messing up at all.

It is a good thing that you can now do these puzzles without help because you have started to exert your independence and get mad if you are helped before you have asked for it. "Top, Mama!" is another phrase I hear whenever I am interfering with whatever it is that you have set your mind to doing. Recently, you have said things ranging from "NO!" to "Wisten me!" to "Wet go". It is actually entertaining to hear you say these things, but we try very hard not to let you see us laugh.

You have mastered the phrases "no" and "all done", but you don't yet say "yes" without prompting. You do say "please" and "thank you" and "sorry" properly. You most often say thank you after you are given "CHOC MILK!" You always say that phrase with an exclamation point. You know that the brown bottle in the fridge is "CHOC MILK!", the red bottle is strawberry, and the other day you picked up the yellow bottle and said, "Yewwo choc milk?" I don't think you would like mustard milk, baby, but I am very proud of you for already knowing some colors. "Orn" is your favorite, and you would prefer to wear your orange shirt daily. I actually don't let you look in your closet when I am picking out your clothes because you don't like that sometimes I pick a blue shirt or a white one. You also are fond of "WED!" which is nearly always said very enthusiastically.

Just two weeks ago you still referred to most animals with their sounds instead of their names, now that is disappearing. In fact, one day you were asking for "Pih", but I had no idea what you were saying. I told you that I was sorry but I didn't know what you wanted, so you said "Oink". It never occurred to me that you were asking for your pig until then. You are starting to count, and just today asked for "two cwaka" when you were only handed one cracker. It makes me very proud that you ask for "amen" when we sit down to eat and that you say "wew Eas" every night when we pray for your friend with leukemia.

Musically, you are pretty hung up on two songs: "Good Morning" and "Boom-Chaka-Laka". I would listen to each of those songs 50 times just to hear you sing along. And really, they are the only songs you will sing. You hear all kinds of songs and nursery rhymes at daycare and at home; you don't really sing those, but you will do the hand motions.

You used to eat anything we would feed you, but recently, you have become a little more particular. Carbs are where it's at for your taste buds right now, but you still eat things daily that your brother will not touch like strawberries, yogurt, pickles and salad. You actually will ask for more salad, which thrills me to no end. Not that you eat your thumb, but you do still suck it some, mostly when you are tired. We aren't too worried about it, especially since you are doing it less and less.

You are two. You weigh 25.8 pounds. You are 36.5 inches tall. That means that you could possibly be 6'1" when you are all grown up, if the old wives' tale is true. You wear 18-24 month shirts, size 4 diapers, size 5.5-6 shoes, and very small shorts - 12 months size still has growing room. Pants are a big challenge because 18 months are too big in the waist and too short in length. Your doctor called you lanky at your two-year check up. You still sleep in your crib, and we really haven't even discussed moving you to a 'big-boy' bed. You are not potty-trained, but you will pee-pee in the potty. For you, the potty is a novel option, and we are in no rush to push you. We love that you cheer "I DID pee-pee!" each time you use the potty. For the record, you generally do not like having your teeth brushed or eating tuna fish. You are changing and learning more every single day. You are a precious baby and our little bear. You are loved more than you will know until you have your own little bear to love.

Love,
Mama and Dada

My Baby, My Little Boy

2011-09-27T10:47:00.003-05:00

Zero:

One:

Two:

As of this minute, I have a two year old child. A baby. A little boy. Never in my life have I had something to look forward to every single minute of the day. Still, two years in, I have days where I absolutely can not stay at work one minute longer because I must leave to go see my baby, my little boy. I honestly hope that never ever changes. He is a joy and a challenge, and the thought of him still brings tears to my eyes. I love you. Happy Birthday!!

Chili in August

2011-08-15T10:27:00.003-05:00

This weekend, I went into the depths of the freezer and found two packs of meat that conveniently were marked 'chili'. These two packs of meat were put away last winter in anticipation of future chili making endeavours. Other folks might have marked this same meat as 'stew' meat. We typically use ground meat to make chili, but apparently we were having some desires to change up the routine when this meat was put away. If I remember correctly, Teen was behind this request.

I generally use one of two different chili kits (Carroll.Shelby's Original Texas Chili or Wick.Fowler's 2-Alarm Chili Kit). AND, chili is also usually a weeknight 'go-to' meal because it comes together rather quickly. This time, because the meat needed to cook a little longer to become tender, I decided to try to make it a little more special. I did still use a kit for the spice mix, but I didn't follow the directions much at all.

2-3 Tbs oil
2 lbs stew meat (I used venison).
1-2 tsp Cajun seasoning
1 onion, chopped
1 8 oz can tomato sauce
1 32 oz can diced tomatoes
1 package Carroll.Shelby’s Original Texas Chili Mix
3-4 cups water
2 beef bouillon cubes
1 can black beans, drained and rinsed.

Heat the oil in a soup pot, season the meat with the Cajun seasoning and brown it in the oil. Then add the onion and cook until translucent. Stir in the chili mix (NOT the masa), tomato sauce, diced tomatoes, water and bouillon cubes. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat, and simmer for 3-4 hours. Add the beans and simmer another hour. Serve.
(I didn’t add the masa packet, but you could if you wanted to – just mix it with 2/3 cup warm water and stir it into the chili when you add the beans.)

Around our house, we have chili with macaroni and cheese. Yes, ours is boxed. I prefer this particular box (KraftThick&Creamy) to homemade. I do not enjoy onions or breadcrumbs in my macaroni and cheese, and I have not found a recipe that matches this flavor and texture.

This chili was AMAZING. The color matched the flavor, rich and dark. I even loved it in AUGUST. I NEVER make chili in August. I rarely make soups, stews, or chili outside of October - April. To me these are 'winter' foods. Are your dishes seasonally directed?

I also made dessert. Let me tell you, this ice cream was very good. It is not your typical ice cream, but it is delicious, and the variations are endless. I used 1/2 tsp vanilla extract, 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon, and 2/3 cups of crumbled dark chocolate brownie. Alone, it was good, not great - so I topped it with caramel sauce, and was perfect. It may be due to the small volume, but I found this ice cream to freeze a bit harder than other ice creams, so keep that in mind. I plan to make a Nutella variation this week.

Atrocious makes Decent seem Great!

2011-08-04T08:30:00.000-05:00

In mid-May, MH and I took Tot in for a trim. Since it was his third haircut, and he had done fairly well with the first two, we took him to MH's 'lady' instead of the kids' chain we had used before. From the time she put the cape on him until we left, it was a nightmare. He screamed and fought and cried. Initially, he did sit still while screaming, but by the end, I was holding him just so that she could make it even in the front. We left the back a little wonky just to get out of there! I vowed via FB that he would be looking quite stylish with long flowing locks before we would endure that again. To be fair, the cape seemed to be the problem. I was too stunned to think to take it off of him. The lady was very patient and kind with him. Also, I do not want him to have a buzz cut, and scissor cuts take a bit longer.

When I left to go to the beach with the gals, I didn't think he was looking too bad. Upon my return, a mere 4 days later, he had changed into Shaggy McRaggamuffin. He practically had to swipe his hair out of his eyes to see me when I came through the door. So Saturday, I decided to take one for the team and took him to the kids' chain again. I decided to nix the cape because that is where the trouble started before - I prepared ahead and brought a change of clothes. We also added in a sucker. He did wiggle more than any other kid I observed during our short wait, but he did NOT scream or fight at all. Positive changes all around!! It wouldn't have taken much to improve on the last experience, but I am definitely going to use the kids' chain - 35 miles from our house - for the foreseeable future!

Would have...

2011-08-03T08:30:00.000-05:00

Today, she would have been 63 years old.
Today, she would have corrected me to let me know that she would have been 63 years YOUNG.
Today, she would have received birthday calls from her kids and precious grandkids.
Today, she would have told me she loved me at the end of our call.

Instead

Today, I will honor the birthday of a mother who left this earth entirely too soon.
Today, I will think of her more often than usual.
Today, I will miss her terribly, just like yesterday.
Today, I will hug Tot a little tighter, just for her, and tell him how much she would have loved him.

Happy Birthday, Mom. I love and miss you.

My Favorites: Girlfriends Edition

2011-08-02T09:00:00.000-05:00

Last week at this time I in my favorite vacation spot with my favorite gals.

I love and miss them so much already - the spot and the gals.

Brothers.

2011-08-01T15:53:00.005-05:00

When it became obvious that any children that MH and I had together would be VERY far apart in age (more than the planned for *by me* 9 years), part of what I mourned was any relationship that the kids would have with Teen. I needn't have worried too much...

It really makes me laugh when these two play blocks together. Well, I guess they aren't so much playing together as they are playing at the same time. Teen is quite serious about his building too!

Tot also likes to copy anything Teen is doing. This can be a dangerous undertaking, so Teen has learned to temper his demonstrations in front of Tot. The plus side is that Tot has MASTERED jumping. He has been jumping with both feet for a couple of months already, but about 2 weeks ago, he also mastered jumping off of things - namely our hearth. He even lands with bended knees and spreads his arms for stability. Tot's version of push-ups is hilarious. He gets on his hands and feet, then jumps his little feet around like he is trying to do a handstand.

It is nice to see them interact and for them to love each other so much. Two weeks from today, Teen starts his senior year of high school. About one year from now, Teen will be leaving for college, and Tot will not have his big brother around every day. I don't know which brother will miss the other more...

Summer Camp - Days 14, 17, and 19

2011-07-19T21:32:00.009-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!!

Day 14 – How do you typically dress to run errands? Do you think bloggers dress better or worse than “regular people”?
Errand attire for me is very casual and easy, and typically jeans or shorts and a t-shirt or other knit shirt. Since I have been known to watch a certain TV Show from time to time, I do try to keep myself presentable. I reserve the huge t-shirts for sleeping, and I have removed some old and faded and worn items from my wardrobe. I never leave the house without earrings (I sleep in my favorites). I rarely leave the house without mascara.

I do not think bloggers dress better or worse than regular people simply because I think bloggers ARE regular people. That means that bloggers dress exactly like 'regular people'! Or MAYBE 'regular people' dress like bloggers! We are pretty cool!

Day 17 – What is your favorite thing about the weekend? Do you take a break from blogs or is this when you catch up?
My favorite thing about the weekend is leisure time. Time to visit friends. Time to stay in pajamas and play cars. Time to pick the vegetables in the morning. How is it that with all that time, there never seems to be enough of it?

I do not have a consistent time to blog, so I typically just blog whenever the urge strikes - weekend or not.

Day 19 – How do you (and your partner if applicable) feel about PDA? Does your husband/wife/partner know that you blog and if so are they involved?

My Honey and I have a little bit of a differing opinion about this one. Neither of us want to make out in public, nor do we want to see others doing that. MH will hold hands and will give me the occasional peck type kiss, but I generally initiate those kisses. I prefer a little more affection in the forms of an arm around the shoulder, a gentle shoulder squeeze in passing, and/or a wink from across the room simply because they make me feel acknowledged and special.
MH does know that I have a blog, but he doesn't participate in it. He doesn't 'get' it. He does read it - because I make him. :) Ironically, he just walked in from the garage and asked, "What are you doing? Writing on our blog?" Yes he said 'our' and he had no idea what I am writing about.

Blog Summer Camp: Day 7

2011-07-07T10:39:00.004-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 7 – What’s your favorite thing to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner? Do you read food blogs or would you ever consider writing one?

Breakfast: A lightly toasted everything bagel with savory cream cheese.
Lunch: A hearty sandwich with great bread and crisp, cold vegetables. The cheese and meat vary frequently. This can range from a sub sandwich to a gyro.
Dinner: Depends on the weather and temperature. Summer dinners are grilled meats and corn on-the-cob with cold watermelon for dessert. Though a BLT is pretty high up there too. Winter dinners are warm, thick, filling chillis and stews - these make heaping amounts for delicious lunches later.

I love to read food blogs and to cook. I would say that I am a food blog junkie. I adore the pictures and methods and ideas. I have found that reading general blogs on my phone is fine, but I very much prefer to read food blogs on a big screen. Every day of my life, I consider writing my own food blog. I do plan to incorporate more food into this blog, but I don't see myself having an all out 'food blog'.

Blog Summer Camp: Day 6

2011-07-06T10:11:00.008-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 6 – When was the last time you tried something new? What was it and what was the result? Have you ever done something just so that you could blog about it?

Last Monday, June 27 was the last time I tried something new. It was Angel Hair Pasta with Shrimp and Cremini Mushrooms in Cherry Tomato Sauce. I rarely cook anything without a recipe, or at least a known framework of what and how. Last week, I just took the fresh ingredients hanging around and made them into something delicious. I was so proud of myself. MH and I each thought the meal was terrific. I don't know how often I will branch out, but this time was definitely worth it. I have yet to do anything just to blog about it, but I can't say that I wouldn't do it.

Angel Hair Pasta with Shrimp and Cremini Mushrooms in Cherry Tomato Sauce:
2 Tbs butter
2 Tbs Olive oil
3 cloves garlic, minced
8 ounces cremini mushrooms
2 cups whole cherry tomatoes
*1-2 tsp dried Italian seasoning
1/8 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
1/4 to 1/2 cup beef broth
1 lb raw, peeled shrimp
12 ounces angel hair pasta
1/2 tsp black pepper
1 tsp salt

Combine the butter and olive oil in a deep sided skillet with a tight fitting lid over medium heat. Add the garlic and sautee for 1-2 minutes, add the mushrooms, tomatoes, Italian seasonng, and black pepper and sautee without the lid. After 5 or so minutes, place the lid on the pan and continue cooking until the tomatoes burst, stirring occasionally. While the pasta cooks in lots of boiling, salted water, use the beef broth to deglaze the tomato pan. Add the shrimp, red pepper flakes and salt. Cook until the shrimp turn pink, stirring occasionally. When the pasta is JUST shy of done, transfer the pasta directly from the boiling water into the shrimp pan using tongs. Stir the pasta around in the sauce and let it stand for 3-4 minutes while the pasta soaks up the remaining broth and tomato goodness. Enjoy with a little parmesan cheese if desired.

*Edited to add the Italian seasoning
**11/16/11: Added to Ingredient Spotlight at Eat at Home Cooks!

Blog Summer Camp: Day 5

2011-07-05T11:50:00.004-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 5 -What do you prefer to do on your birthday?

For my birthday, I prefer to have the day off work, and I usually schedule vacation for that day very early in the year. I like to have somewhat free reign that day. Lunch is my husband and me alone at one of a few restaurants that he would never pick if he didn't love me. Then we shop or sight see or take a walk down town. My favorite way to end the day is to spend time with great friends and share a meal and just visit. Most often, dinner is at a fairly nice restaurant, but homecooked is perfectly fine too, even if I cook it.

Growing up, our mom made HUGE deals out of our birthdays. I am the youngest of four children. We always had parties. My birthday is a few days after Halloween, and one year, she turned our entire back porch into a haunted house for one of my birthday parties. She made us elaborate cakes. The party was most often not on the actual date of birth, so on that day we got to plan the day's menu, and she would make us anything we picked. I most often picked burritos. My mom died 19 days after my 26th birthday. I was able to talk to her, but not see her, that birthday. She knew it was a special day, but she couldn't get the words out. She said it was "Papa's Anniversary". I was born the day after my grandfather's birthday (Papa). I suppose that I would prefer to have my mom cook me anything I wanted for my birthday, even now. I used to expect a lot more from a birthday, but I've realized that having loving friends and family around is more than enough.

Blog Summer Camp: Day 4

2011-07-04T22:31:00.000-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 4 – What has most surprised you about being an adult? What have you learned about yourself through blogging?

Until Tot came into this world, I didn't really feel like an adult even though I was over 30 when he got here. That is the most surprising thing to me about being an adult. Yes, I had/have a job, and I paid/pay bills. I married and even parented Teen, but I almost always sought out someone else's advice to handle my big decisions. Sometimes, I even followed the advice! While I was pregnant, I started to feel like a grown-up. Another human being was growing inside of me, and I was responsible for his everything. Now, even though I may ask others for opinions or advice, ultimately, what they say is only a small part of my decision.

I will be skipping the second question for now. I don't feel that I have enough blogging under my belt to answer it.

Blog Summer Camp: Day 3

2011-07-03T10:08:00.001-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 3 -What are your guilty pleasures?

The concept of a guilty pleasure is odd for me to grasp. I actually had to search "what is a guilty pleasure" because the first things that came to mind for me were food and reading. Both of those things are highly pleasurable to me, but I do not feel guilty about either. When I read this definition, the answer popped into my head: The Beach.

How I love The Beach. The smells of the salt water and sunscreen. The sound of the waves. The feel of the grainy warm sand. The complete and total relaxation the combination of all of those things gives me when I am not with my kids on The Beach. Therein lies the guilt. To me, there is no relaxation found in trying to keep a tiny human from drowning and being washed out to sea. There is pleasure in seeing them love the beach the way I do, but not the pleasure I feel when I am there with terrific girlfriends soaking up the scents and sounds of The Beach. I will be feeling immense pleasure and guilt in about 20 days and I cannot wait!

Blog Summer Camp: Day 2

2011-07-02T09:30:00.002-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 2 -What were you like in high school? What extracurricular activities, if any, did you take part in during high school? Did you consider yourself a writer?

Looking back, it is pretty easy to say how others would probably describe me in high school: goody two-shoes. It is not so easy for me to sum up myself back then. I did not enjoy then, nor do I now, anyone being mad at me. Even worse for me was for someone to be disappointed in me, so I did my best to avoid that happening. If my friends were going to get into trouble while we were out, then I would ask them to take me home. This is not to say that I didn't get into trouble now and then, and I made poor decisions like most teens, but I was aware that consequences would be had.

I was well known but not popular, per se. My two best friends and I were inseparable for years. I was our high school's valedictorian. I procrastinated, and I still do. My valedictory speech was written the morning of graduation, and I thought it sucked. Everyone told me it was great - enablers! I was a gymnast throughout junior high and high school. I LOVED drama club. I starred in two plays in high school: "Twelve Angry Jurors" (a co-ed version of "Twelve Angry Men") and "It Was A Dark and Stormy Night".

I was much more conservative then. Black and white was how I thought the world worked. I based a lot of my morals then on my religious upbringing, though I am much more in touch with my faith and more liberal now.

I do not consider myself a writer. In fact, I detest writing for grades. I do enjoy blogging, and I adore reading.

Hmmmm....maybe I was a goody-two shoes! I am so glad I lightenend the hell up!

Photo Friday: Vibrance

2011-07-01T09:13:00.001-05:00

MH and I have had some great luck with our cherry tomato plant this year! These sweet and beautiful tomatoes have proven to be delicious straight off the vine and in salsa, salads and sauces.

Do you have a bright photo you want to share today?

Blog Summer Camp: Day 1

2011-07-01T08:53:00.004-05:00

You can come to Summer Camp too!
Day 1 – Provide a photo or sketch or dramatic rendering of the space where you normally blog

On my lunch break, promise!!

Though I actually wrote this entry from our laptop at home.

To the Windy City!

2011-06-24T15:36:00.005-05:00

A work meeting prompted MH and me to take a couple days of vacation and get away together for a bit - in Chicago!! We arrived last Sunday evening, and he left on Tuesday evening. I stayed over for the meeting and left Thursday afternoon. I had been there on a girls' trip in 2007, and I really enjoyed it. This time, I loved it even more. It is such a clean city, and with the rare exception, we found everyone we encountered to be very friendly and even helpful! We had a relatively leisurely time and just flitted where the wind (and trains) took us. Teen is loosely considering attending college in Chicago, and a small part of me hopes he will go just so we can visit!

High points:
-Pineapple upside-down cheesecake for breakfast Monday morning.
-The Willis Tower Skydeck (formerly the Sears Tower). HA! High point - get it!! There really is an amazing view from up there.
-Transportation to Michigan Avenue via water taxi. It was a scenic and affordable way to get from A to B.
-Seeing a beautiful, convertible Maserati outside Fox.&.Obel. This is actually two high points. First, MH was totally caught taking a picture of the Maserati by the lady who, presumably, owned it. She loaded her groceries in the trunk, let the top down and drove off!! Second, we walked around inside Fox.&.Obel. Oh my, the money and time I could spend in there! That place is just wonderful to me!
-Visiting Wrigley Field. Something about seeing that red sign on the ball park made me feel like I was staring at a real part of Americana. The Cubs won, which I am sure was a high point for many, but I didn't really care who won.
-Each time we would see something neat or arrive at a new place of interest, I would tell MH, "You've never kissed me here before!" I didn't know that he was paying that much attention until we were on a train leaving Wrigley and he said it to me.

-The Bean (Cloud Gate). I am so intrigued by that thing. It amazes me that someone even thought to make that!

-Lou Malnati's. The pizza was delicious (oh that mozzarella!), but The Malnati Salad was amazing. We ordered a medium and shared it with a lady we chatted with at the bar - delicious and sizable. We left there with two bottles of the salad dressing to bring home. Also, having beer with lunch was a nice change!
-Seeing a huge city and taking in its scale and atmosphere with wonder and all the wile appreciating home.
-Navy Pier. Yes, it is touristy, but it is also interesting. The Ferris Wheel was nice too. I didn't know that one has to get on and off of it while it is moving!
-Feeling empowered and safe as I navigated my way back to Union Station alone (see below).
-Seeing Tot's expression when he saw me in the airport. He raced to me, wrapped his little arms around me and hugged me like it was his job*!

Low points:
-Leaving our camera on the train and the Hinsdale Station Monday evening. We realized it JUST as the train was pulling from the station, but there was nothing we could do. We have visited and called lost and found, but so far, no camera. Therefore, we only have iPhone pictures of our trip, but at least we have those!
-Noticing Pizano's RIGHT after having eaten a delicious lunch at Lou Malnati's. I had the most delectable gnocchi and pesto sauce there in 2007. I could remember the area and look of the restaurant, but not the name until I saw it again. It was much closer to our starting point than Lou Malnati's, but we didn't have time to have another meal together because we ate a late lunch. BUT, even if I had known, we probably would have passed it up because Chicago style pizza was on the Must-Do List! In retrospect, I should have ordered something from there to go and taken it back to the hotel with me for dinner.
-Having to say goodbye to MH at the Jackson Street Blue Line stop because he had to go to O'hare, and I had to go back to my hotel in a suburb. We were both emotional, and I walked back to Union Station with only my tears.
-Being emotionally spent then realizing that I had boarded the wrong train back to the suburb. I was trying to make the 7:00 train and thought I lucked out by making the 6:50. Notice: The 6:50 train doesn't stop at or near the Hinsdale station. I REALLY wanted to scream, but decided against it. Instead, I texted a friend in ALL CAPS; it all worked out in the end.
-Missing Tot. We have been away from Teen for extended periods before, but not Tot. It was hard, but so worth it!

To the Windy City: Thank you for a wonderful time! If we are fortunate enough to visit again, a bicycle tour and Pizano's are on the Must-Do List for sure!

*I ran across the "...like it was his job" phrase recently, and I love it. I also love that that is how Tot hugs me right now.

Photo Friday: Sun

2011-06-10T08:00:00.009-05:00

This picture was taken 3 years ago next week. The face and sunglasses belong to one of my best friends. She moved to California in 2000. We made a pact when she moved out there that we would get together at least once a year barring active labor. So far, we have kept it up! On this particular trip we took a cruise. We were enjoying some beach time in Playa del Carmen with two other girlfriends.

It was a great trip, and the beach was amazing, but I had NO contact with MH for 5 entire days. I would not take another cruise that long without my family. It was nice to be out of touch with the world, but not out of touch with my family. However, looking back now, it was very nice to be in touch with myself for a little while to sort out my own feelings from those of other people. It was on this trip that I was able to hear my own thoughts and my own heart and came to realize that *I* did, in fact, want to have my own child. Now, I have a totally different ray of sunshine.

ETA: Click the badge to the right so you can play along too! Thanks again for a great theme, Calliope!

Photo Friday: Chair

2011-06-03T10:49:00.005-05:00

Last Saturday, MH got up early to go out of town for the day. Teen had a friend over whose vehicle was blocking MH's, so he had to wake up the friend to move it. Also, around this time, I heard Tot (via the monitor) say "Mama". He quieted right back down and I didn't hear more talking or movement, so I figured he went back to sleep.

I was right. When I woke up TWO HOURS later, and went to check on him, I found him and his big brother sound asleep in the rocking chair - where they each slept for another hour.

Thanks, Calliope, great theme this week.

What I'm Loving Wednesday: 6/1/11

2011-06-01T13:01:00.004-05:00

Share your love too!

I'm loving that Teen is having a blast attending our state's Boys State this week. He and two other young men were interviewed on a local TV station this morning. He did a great job, and looked so handsome. He is so personable and friendly. In Teen, Tot has a great model for how to treat people.

I'm loving Tot. When MH and I were still undecided about having a child of our own, most women that I came across who were moms told me about this love that a mom has for her baby. I secretly thought that these women were a little off their rockers the way they would go on and on about this love. That this little person's every word and action captures my attention so completely still boggles my mind. So now, I can completely understand what those moms were telling me. And I was also right, because I am totally off my rocker when it comes to loving my little baby.

I'm loving that tonight is DATE NIGHT! MH and I don't go out without Tot very often. I know that we should, but we just don't. Tonight we are going to take Tot to a sitter and enjoy dinner and a movie as a couple. I actually don't remember the last movie that I saw with MH in a theater. Usually, I attend movies with Teen or with a good girlfriend of mine.

I'm loving the book Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire by John Cymbala. It is about the power of prayer, and it's affect on Brooklyn.Tabernacle. It really speaks to me in the way that I understand my faith.

I'm loving that MH and I have kept up with our laundry for the last three weeks. This may seem like something odd to love, but having the laundry done makes me feel accomplished and grown up. Since getting back into church and having Tot, the biggest chore to suffer around our house has been laundry. So I LOVE that we have made an effort to get it done and stay on top of it for a few weeks now.

Forgetting is an Option

2011-04-25T12:37:00.007-05:00

On Christmas Eve, I posted to my Facebook page that Tot had practiced his nose blowing skillz on tissue paper in a gift under our tree. Luckily, he was just practicing. A friend commented that she hoped I was "keeping a log of these things". Since that day, I've been meaning to keep a log of "these things" here.
As time passes so quickly and our family changes along with it, I know that forgetting moments and memories is an option that will inevitably occur if I don't get it out of my head and onto something a little less crowded...like this blog.

Teen attended his first high school prom this month. He was SO handsome and so excited. He and his date were the most beautiful couple there, I can say that with certainty from my sample of one couple. He cracked me up with his excitement. In his spare time before picking up his date, he searched online for something creative to do with his pocket-square. I must say, he did a great job of making origami from fabric. Since I haven't downloaded from the good camera in ages, I have no pictures to share since all the photos on my phone include his date, and I don't want to put her picture out there in cyberworld. Trust me, they were gorgeous.

Tot is turning into an all out character. I'm going to do the boring thing and list the words that he says, but this is for me anyway!! However, if anyone is reading, this will be boring. Tots words at nearly 19 months: Mama, Dada, Dyedah (Teen's Name), gittle-gittle-gittle (tickle), Nah-na (dog's name), Sahdie (other dog's name), Poo Bah (other dog's nickname), Peppa (a cousin), Sid (TV show), ta-tu (thank you), Sue (shoe and sock), cohl (cold), AHT! (hot), cah (car), sigh (outside), bbbbbn bbbbbbn* (4-wheeler/lawn mower/dad), Sihl (Silky, his blanket), nah-uh (actually this is 'knock-knock'), baw (ball), DUP! (jump), nonose (nose), ah (eye), mou (mouth), teese (teeth), byss (brush the noun and the verb), buple (buckle and bubble), ca-cuh (cracker and cookie), manna/manana (banana), Mah (from the TV show, this just started within the last few days), buhday (no idea, but he says it often), shah (also no idea, but also said often). This equals 25+ recognizable words used correctly and a couple that are anyone's guess. He has also said a sentence, "I watch Sid." And, no, we don't let him watch it all the time, much to his disappointment. ETA: He also says 'poon' (spoon) and 'no', which most often means no, but sometimes means yes.

Tot also knows a few animal sounds and sound effects, and I think most of them are hilarious. He growls for a bear and a lion - sort of like 'wahhhhhhw'; ooh-oooooh for an owl, ascending in scale ooooooooooh for a wolf, mowww (cat), moo (cow), tickle-doo (rooster), OCK (pig), bahk bahk (chicken, complete with flapping wings); a really good effort at whistling (dog). He has actually tried to whistle for the last few months. Since I whistle for the dogs, I guess he thinks that is what a dog 'says'. We tell him 'woof-woof', but he prefers to try to whistle. A kiss isn't a kiss if a loud, prolonged 'MMMAH' doesn't accompany it. *I suppose that bbbbbn-bbbbbbbn could be considered a sound effect, but that just isn't how he uses it.

Easter weekend was a lot of fun for us. Teen and I sang in the Easter choir at church. Most of our family came to visit. We did all the great fun things like dye eggs, attend and host Easter egg hunts, visit family, eat great food and greater candy. Something that I hope gets left off as a tradition is not one but TWO bloody wounds this weekend. The first was to my sister's pinky while she tried to cut an orange that she was HOLDING IN HER HAND. The second was to Tot. The only reason we did't go to the ER with Tot is because Aunt Nurse was in attendance and was able to handle the situation. Tot was outside climbing under his dad's supervision (the child CLIMBS a LOT) and fell and cut his head. I was not the picture of calm. My Honey, as he breezed past carrying our SCREAMING baby with blood COVERING his face, tried to assure me that everything was 'fine', but I was unconvinced. One steristrip and some hugs and love later: he's fine.

Tot actually did get the hang of hunting eggs. We enjoyed it too because he would say "Oooooooh" with his little lips puckered every time he spotted one.

I tried some more baking. These Bunny Buns were every bit as cute as I expected, but I wasn't pleased with the results because they didn't match what I expected in taste or texture. However, I accidentally messed up the recipe by adding an extra egg, so I'll give them another shot.

Tot eats!

2011-04-12T12:17:00.004-05:00

How much do I love that Tot eats? I love it so much. I also realize that it may not always be this way, so I am trying to soak in his gustatory variety as much as possible. Last night he ate half of a chicken and black bean enchilada that was a little spicy. He kept signing* 'more' every time he took a bite. He loves tomatoes, sweet potatoes, grapes, yogurt, cheese, ranch dressing on salad (seriously! Salad!!!), and apparently black bean and chicken enchiladas! These may seem ordinary or normal to some, but to me, watching a child enjoy vegetables and Salad! is a sight for my sore eyes. Teen will not touch yogurt, tomatoes, salad, any dipping sauces other than ketchup or barbeque. A teen who doesn't like ranch. I didn't know they existed. Tot will also eat avocado - another of Teen's aversions.
ETA 4/25/11: Tot LOVES dill pickles. Teen will not touch a pickle of any flavor.

Teen has broadened his palate recently to actually request roasted broccoli and he will also now eat corn in an ingredient form, but not as corn by itself. He is realizing that his tastes have changed and is a lot more willing to give new foods a try and is actually more likely to like a brand new dish than MH. Food! I love it almost as much as those boys!

*'More' is really the only sign Tot uses that I can recognize. He has made up others, but didn't give me the translation yet. He used to sign 'all done', but stopped doing that one in favor of trying to toss all items within his reach onto the floor.

Ladies Who Lunch

2011-03-26T13:45:00.003-05:00

Back in November, I did finally decide to attend the Women's Retreat sponsored by our church. About 30-40 women attended the retreat, and I honestly could not be happier that I was in attendance. The main theme was directly what I needed to focus on: Galatians 5:22, the Fruit of the Spirit.

There were activities and worship designed for the entire group, and other times, we split off into our small groups for more intimate discussions. All the women were split into rooms of five to eight women. Our particular room had five women. I casually knew two of the women. One woman was a good acquaintance of mine, but I had never met the fifth woman. The five of us left the retreat friends - nearly as close as sisters. So far, we have remained in touch. In February, I decided to have the ladies over for lunch. Below is our menu.

Italian Vegetable Soup: This recipe is splendid! It tastes better the day after it is made, so I cooked it the night before our lunch (this lessens stress on the big day too). I modified this recipe because I was also preparing a pasta salad, so I omitted the egg noodles and reduced the liquid by one cup. I served garlic croutons and shredded Parmesan cheese with this flavorful soup.

Bruschetta Pasta Salad: Oh wow. This was tasty. I made this the night before also, and served it cold alongside sliced English cucumber and orange bell peppers.

I ran out of time and energy to make garlic rolls from scratch, so I made frozen yeast rolls (Rh.odes), and spread the tops fresh from the oven with the garlic butter mixture in the linked recipe.

Mexican Chocolate Cake: This recipe is a showstopper. It is beautiful and decadent. We all enjoyed a little fresh brewed coffee with our cake, and I thought we would faint from the deliciousness of it all. I followed this recipe exactly. I made the cakes the night before. I prepped the frosting the night before by combining the mascarpone with the other ingredients (except the whipped cream) and refrigerating overnight. The next morning, I just whipped the cream and folded it with the already prepared flavors from the night before.

I highly recommend taking the time to have a nice lunch with a terrific group of friends. It's good for the soul.

More Spring!

2011-03-26T13:03:00.004-05:00

Apparently, I do not know how to correctly add pictures. Here is one more that I love from the daffodil festival.

On the same day as the daffodil picture extravaganza, we co-hosted our first official crawfish boil which was also the first one we attended this season. I don't have pictures of that, but I do have a recipe for King Cake! I am just starting to experiment with yeast, and this recipe struck me as one I could tackle. We all enjoyed this rich, eggy pastry. Teen and I are already fans of chocolate and cinnamon, so the filling in this one was a bonus and not the traditional filling for this type of cake. We do not have a stand mixer, and this one was no trouble to mix by hand. Typically, I do not do 'real' baking because I do not like to get dough all over my hands, but I conquered my fear for this one. We were all glad of it!

Spring!!

2011-03-26T12:56:00.003-05:00

Happy Spring! Around here, we have a lovely festival for daffodils. They are beautiful, and we visited there a couple weeks ago. Tot was napless, and Teen had to work, but we enjoyed it nonetheless.

Catching up with words and pictures

2011-01-08T17:19:00.008-06:00

Reading blogs is something I really enjoy. I read several different kinds. I have limited myself to regularly reading just a few since Tot came into our world. I have a genuine interest in hearing about other peoples' lives. I have always been fascinated by watching people do what they do, so I suppose blog reading is an extension of that. Either that, or I'm just nosy! Because I do not regularly update, and rarely post pictures, I've been feeling like a selfish blog hog lately. All take and no give. So now I give.

Teen had a birthday. We had a few people over for dinner to celebrate. The picture below was taken then. I also made THREE cakes to mark the occasion. We took all three cakes to our church youth to surprise Teen. He actually believed that I was baking three cakes for a potluck at work. I guess he was surprised!

We had a wondrous Christmas. Everything good thing I ever heard about Christmas with a small child is true. I've always been a huge fan of Christmas, but this year took it to an entirely new level. Family, food, friends, fun. What more could anyone ask for? Two pics for this occasion. One of me with my dad and siblings, and one of Teen and Tot.

Finally, we rang in 2011. With 2011, came the first haircut. MH had been wanting to take Tot for a haircut since...August. Me? Notsomuch. In November, I told him to just give me until after the first of the year, then I would consider it. Those precious curls in the picture above were totally unpredictable. Sometimes nothing but adorable curls covered his head. All the rest of the time, his locks were flat on his head, covering ears (like my mind's image of an elf). Christmas is gone, no need for elves for 12 months.

And I have to say, he might be even cuter now.

One more, just because I love them so:

Happy New Year!

The Time is Coming!!

2010-12-01T13:36:00.003-06:00

We are due to get a new computer TOMORROW!! I am so excited. All of our pictures will be on it. It will be fast and capable of storing music AND photos instead of just music. Also, it will work. I really have the blogging bug lately, but not really the blogging ability. I hope to remedy this situation starting very, very soon.

I am looking forward to sharing some recipes and some photos of "Tot vs. Christmas Tree". We will see how he does. We will be putting it up in the dining room instead of the living room this year so that we can separate the two rooms with a baby gate. I have zero interest in being the Christmas Tree Police for an entire month.

Looking forward to a busy and terrific Christmas season! Happy December!

Where's my tiny baby?

2010-11-17T13:20:00.007-06:00

He has turned into this silly, bubbly, slightly bigger baby!

Tot's first birthday was harder on me than any of my own birthdays have been on me. Actually, it was the anticipation of his birthday. In my mind, newborns and one-year-olds were worlds apart. One-year-olds, to me, were practially ready for kindergarten. Newborns are needy and snuggly and precious and BABIES. As it turns out, so are one-year-olds. Well, at least, MY one-year-old is. Because I've never lived with a baby, I hadn't realized that though time goes so fast it seems unreal, that it also goes at a pace sentimental parents are perfectly equipped to handle. Apparently, a good friend of mine was thinking along the same vein. As she was watching him play before his birthday party, she said to no one in particular, "He's still a baby." I am pleased to report that Tot and I both made it through his birthday with flying colors.

It has occurred to me more than once that there was a precise reason why this particular baby was born to our family at the precise time that he was. Had he been born when *I* wanted, he'd be nearly 7 by now. I would have rushed the crawling and walking and talking and every other milestone. He is such a joy to our whole family. I appreciate this time with Tot as a baby because once it is gone, it will never be back. God's timing is perfect.

Still, though, he is growing and learning so quickly, that I'd better get some of it written down before it all leaves my memory. He took his first step one week before turning 11 months old, and he has never looked back. He will eat pretty much anything. I don't expect it to last, so I am enjoying every second of sharing hummus and broccoli-cheese soup with him. The first body part he learned was 'foot' - and he only ever shows us his right one. Then he learned 'mouth', and he shows it to us by sticking his foot in it, literally. Next, we moved on to 'tongue', and he goes 'mmmmmm' whenever he sticks it out - just like I do. Now he also knows 'nose', as demonstrated below.

Last night, I decided to teach him where his belly was, but he already knew. He yanked his shirt right up to show me his belly too! I suppose I'll let daycare have credit for that one.

Amazing. Simply amazing. And to think that I ever considered not doing this.

What's Goin' On...

2010-10-18T16:16:00.003-05:00

**New blog names**
Teenage son (aka Squirt) = TEEN
Toddler son = TOT
How clever of me!
Or maybe teenager son should be Tater? Ok, I won't.

Do you ever have those crazily busy times with a whole lot of everything, but not much of anything? That's what we are dealing with right now. It is wearing me out. Just the minor childhood illnesses and 'round the house duties would be enough, but then we have to throw in things like 'being sociable' and 'working' and 'watching Grey's Anatomy', and the schedule fills up pretty quickly.

Many people thrive on having something to do all.the.time. My Honey is mostly this way, unless football is on, then he can veg with the best of them. I have to have down time or I just get irritable. Before Tot came along, I had oodles of down time, even with Teen because he would go and do with his dad. Now, though, my usual down time is filled to the brim with chasing a baby, bathing a baby, feeding a baby, playing with a baby, loving on a baby. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Our baby is well loved and very loving, but I need a break.

I have only slept away from Tot once in 55 weeks. I was so sad about being away from him (for business), that it was hard to enjoy my time away; plus it was a whirlwind trip. The next time I had the opportunity to do it, I was fully prepared to enjoy it, but the weather had other plans. My two nights away turned into one evening in an airport. In a couple of weeks, I am going on a weekend long women's retreat. I am very excited about it, but also a little nervous. He will be staying with another family because MH and Teen will also be gone the same weekend for something else. I feel guilty. I know that's normal, but it doesn't keep me from feeling that way. On the bright side, the house should be relatively in order when I return because no one will be there to mess it up! There is just something about coming home to a neat house that makes coming home so much sweeter.
How do you relax? When? Do you still feel guilty when you leave your kids?

Guess What?!?

2010-10-07T08:52:00.003-05:00

He arrived safe and sound and has now celebrated his first birthday! My plan is to ultimately chronicle our lives here every so often. A spark of interest in cooking has reappeared in my life, and I'd like to share some of that too. I really love reading blogs, but I have never been much of a blogger myself. We will see where this goes. Have a great day!!

Little Bitty

2009-06-14T17:33:00.006-05:00

The nickname I've given to our baby is Little Bitty. I'm the only one who uses that nickname. MH calls the baby various things, and Squirt just says "the baby". The exciting thing is that we are all able to use the same pronoun now: HE! We are reasonably certain that the addition to our family will be a boy. Unfortunately, I do not posess reliable evidence to support this claim. We were able to clearly discern the nature of his parts on the screen during the u/s; in fact, I announced his boy-ness to the tech and MH before the tech said anything. Sadly, what was captured on the disc and mailed to us is not clearly discernable as much of anything.

We have decided his first name but not a middle. We are one of "those" families who is not sharing the name until he gets here. The main reason is that at this moment, he will be our only baby together. We want to keep a little of it for just the three of us until he gets here.

In lieu of u/s pictures, here are comparative belly shots from 2/21 (8w6d) and 6/6 (23w6d).

My description is that people who know me can tell I'm pregnant, but strangers probably can't (and probably don't care).

I'd like to be better at this!

2009-06-14T16:41:00.002-05:00

When do I think of blogging? Every day.
When do I actually blog? About once a month.
I CAN blog from work, but I feel guilty about it. When I get home at night, I just don't make the time. I'm going to try to do better. Sunday's are good days to blog/read/relax. Maybe I can squeeze in a blog post each Sunday? I feel that I'm doing a disservice to my memory by neglecting my blog.

Today will be two in one day: the next one deserves it's own post (a few weeks ago).

I'll give the second trimester it's own summation soon (don't laugh). These observations are actually CURRENT news. Notable observations of late include being less emotional, a new-found ability to stay up late, and O.doul's is good (CoorsNA notsomuch).

For the most part, T1 was pretty emotionally uneventful for me. T2 started the waterworks and the worries and the other fun emotional games. A question on a jury questionnaire asked if there was any reason that I would not want to serve on a particular jury for a capitol murder/kidnapping/battery trial. I answered: "I am pregnant and emotional." Lately though, it seems that some of that has passed. I hear that it will be back soon enough, and that's okay too.

Even before pregnancy, I've never been the type to stay up incredibly late. Eleven o'clock, in the absence of a good reason, has always been pushing it for me. Good reasons usually involve chatting with good friends, vacations, and/or the Internet. At one time or another, the following have not been "good reasons": dates, studying for tests, laundry, and/or the last five minutes of that show we've been watching for 2 hours. With pregnancy, I've not been plagued with extreme fatigue, but bed time ~around 10 pm~ has been one of my favorite times of the day! A weekend nap has been a long-time friend as well. A great friend of mine was in town for 3 nights last week, and we stayed up past midnight 2 of those nights, and past 11 the other night. Then, DH and I traveled to another state to watch a fabulous concert this past Friday, and we were up until 1:30 am! I haven't worked since Tuesday, and I've not had a nap yet.

Finally, O.doul's is a tasty and satisfying substitute for the particular beer taste that I was wanting. On the out-of-state concert trip, a (smoke-free) bar we went to to pass the time had no O.doul's but did have CoorsNA. CoorsNA just didn't do it for me. Thats not to say that other's may have the exact opposite opinion. I'm not a fan of stronger beer flavor. I like light beer. Live and learn.

Alright, tune in in just a few for the totally-deserving-of-it's-own-post post.

She didn't make it...

2009-05-05T11:58:00.002-05:00

Dad and his wife married in 1992. They found out on their 16th wedding anniversary that she had cancer on her spine. It had metastasized there, and no one was sure of its origin. She/they elected to have only palliative care. She had several really rough and painful months followed by 3 or 4 relatively good months. The good months included Thanksgiving and Christmas. She cooked some. She bossed my dad around. Most importantly, she felt well enough to sit and actually eat with us. When we told her about Baby, it was a good day.

The end of the good months started around February. She made slow but steady decline. My dad, as her caregiver, was finally unable to control her pain at home about 3 to 4 weeks ago. He took her to the hospital on a Saturday evening. Examination showed more cancer and more deteriorated vertebrae.

Sunday evening, Easter Sunday, we visited her at the hospital. She was in immense pain. I took her hand and kissed her forehead. She whispered, "You can't tell." After a second, it dawned on me what she meant. I said, "No, not yet." Then she mouthed, "You look the same." I told her, "Yep, I sure do." Dad said, "You should have been here all day, you're the first person she's talked to." I told him that babies have that effect on people. He agreed. She didn't speak to anyone else. Very soon after our exchange, the medication allowed her to rest. She rested that evening and five more; she breathed her last breath one early morning with Dad by her side.

We were pretty sure from the beginning that she wouldn't make it to see or hold Baby. Before Dad had to take her to the hospital the last time, I told him that I hoped she could be made comfortable and last long enough to know what we are having. He hoped so too, but neither of us would have her suffer for it. She didn't make it...we'll all miss her.

First Trimester: Rather Uneventful

2009-05-04T11:14:00.007-05:00

Pre-pregnancy, tender b00bs have signaled an impending period since I was in my teens, so that in and of itself was not a clue for me. The missed period - hmmm...I can usually set my clock by my cycle. So, January 22, I took a test, and found out that, if all goes as planned, MH and I will be expanding our family in early Fall! Sometime near the end of March (23rd or 30th), depending on when it officially ends, Baby and I left the first trimester in the past.
My symptoms over that time included: possible implantation bleeding 2-3 days before I would have started my period, missed period, the most painful and tender b00bs imaginable, slightly less painful and tender b00bs, some light cramping, cysts on both ovaries, z e r o sex-drive, and anti-cravings. Symptoms that I did not encounter include: morning sickness, nausea (with 1 minor exception related to a pepperoni filled pastry - ewww), frequent urination, fatigue, darkening areas of skin, increased sex-drive.

Nothing listed is all that weird exept for my anti-cravings, but I'd like to expand on three of the items, so I will.
~Explaining the b00b pain is very difficult. They really, REALLY hurt. They hurt all the time. The WORST was removal of the bra in the evening. Free swinging is a BAD idea. Luckily, the intensity of the pain did decrease after a month or so, but they are still tender. At least, I don't cringe to bathe now.
~Anti-craving might be a documented phenomenon (food aversion), but I like to think I invented it. It all started with broccoli. Normally, I love broccoli (and most other vegetables) no matter how it's served. So, thinking that I'd get a leg up on some good nutrition, I bought a head of broccoli. I cut it up, ate a little then, and put it in the fridge. The next day, I opened the fridge and saw the broccoli, and I was totally grossed out. I didn't smell it or touch it or taste it, but broccoli, or any other vegetable, was no longer for me. This has not really slacked up, but I am forcing myself to eat more of them because I know they are good for us. Dear Vegetables, It's not you, it's me.
~The sex-drive, or lack thereof. Two of my friends both said that they COULD NOT GET ENOUGH for the entire 9 months. One of my sisters said that was true for her during the 2nd trimester. Uh, notsomuch. I do not want it. There is no mental or physical drive for it. I am sure hoping this turns around. Even my sexy dreams go unfinished. GAH! Dear MH, It's not you, it's me. I love you, and appreciate your (relative) acceptance of this (hopefully)temporary glitch.

Well, this is a huge post for an uneventful trimester. I should post more often, it's not like I'm doing anything else!

So Much for "Remembering"...

2009-04-08T12:56:00.007-05:00

Wow...I have no excuses. I have kept up with the bloggers I read, but I haven't been blogging.

This pregnancy is thankfully progressing quite uneventfully. Since my last post way back on February 12, I have progressed from 7w4d* to 15w3d, safely into the second trimester. I've gained 5 pounds. I've outgrown several pairs of pants, and I am wearing some maternity clothes, but I really have no "bump" to speak of. We've taken a few belly shots, but nothing worthy of posting has showed up yet. I have had 2 OB appointments. Both were uneventful. We've heard Baby's heartbeat twice. The first time we weren't told the heart rate, but most recently, the heart rate was 159.

AND several families in blogland have been blessed with new additions! Congratulations to Calliope, Jennepper, JJ, Erin, Mel, and Tanis (when/if I figure out how to link, I'll update those names with links). I plan to do a first trimester summary soon so that at least some of my memory goal is achieved. Lastly, I am happy that someone missed me!! Thanks, Jill!

*I updated my counting to correspond with what the doctor has on file from the ultrasound. Basically, I adjusted forward 3 days.

Firsts

2009-02-12T14:50:00.005-06:00

First Prenatal Appointment: 2/9/09, 6w4d LMP. Everything appears normal and healthy. EDD updated to 9/27/09.

First Ultrasound: 2/9/09. Baby measured 9mm, 7w0d. Heartrate 141 bpm.

First Picture of Baby posted on blog: 2/12/09. A disk arrived in the mail yesterday from the radiology group that performed the ultrasound. That disk contained 2 digital pictures. I was so excited to receive this since they told us at the appointment that we would not be receiving any images to take home.

Who Knows?

2009-02-05T21:11:00.009-06:00

My Honey and I have enjoyed telling people about this baby. So far, we have limited it to close friends and family because it is still so early.

We let Squirt tell MH's mom and dad. He said, "Did y'all hear about the kid that's coming to live with us in October?" They both looked like they were waiting for the punchline. MH's dad was laughing and asking Squirt to repeat himself because he couldn't really understand him since he talks fast. Then Squirt added, "The only thing is that it hasn't been born yet." MH's mom eyes got so big, then she asked if I was pregnant, and we told her yes. MH's dad started crying and hugged me so tightly. Then his mom hugged me too. She asked if we were trying or if it was an accident...lol. They were both very happy to get to be grandparents again. They forgot to congratulate MH until a couple days later. Ha!

My dad and his wife live almost 2 hours from us. We drove down the next day to tell them in person.* I asked them to pose for a picture so that I could try out a new setting on my camera. They were happy to oblige. My dad always says, "Say whiskey!" before taking a picture. After he said that, I said, "Say 'JP's pregnant!'."** My stepmom said, "J's...(gasp) ARE you?" I smiled and nodded yes; she started crying. My dad said, "Well, I'll be." Then, he grinned and reached out to shake MH's hand and asked, "Did you have anything to do with this?" He's such a cheeseball.

Oldest Sister: I broke down and told her over the phone even though I didn't want to do it that way. She asked me if I'd been shopping to get a particular item yet, and I told her that I hadn't because I'd had other things on my mind - "Like, being pregnant." Her response: Yaaaaaaaay.

Her son (16): Asked him what he was doing - reading. Told him I was reading too: What to Expe.ct When You're Expe.cting. It took him a minute. He was excited and asked some neat questions.

Brother: He's overseas right now. We mailed him a letter, and he received it on 2/6/09. He was VERY excited and called me on my way to work to let me know.

SIL: I told her that I had some left over pregnancy tests to give her the next time I saw her (she and Brother are considering TTC #3 when he gets home). She was quick, got it immediately. I swore her and their two boys (13 and 10) to secrecy until Brother got his letter.

Older Sister: Called her and asked what she was doing - surfing the net. I told her to Goo.gle 'due date cal.culator'. "WHY?" "Because, just do it." Click, click, click..."October 1st...(gasp) JP, am I going to be an aunt?" "Yes!" Her two younger ones (16 and 11) were cute when I told them. Her oldest (19) was hilarious. She said, "Oh, that is so exciting!! Have you told Uncle MH yet?" "No, Sweetie, I wanted to make sure I told you first." "Oh, yeah, duh." LOL!!

Sweetest of all was my grandmother. She is 88 and has alzheimer's, BUT the day I told her was a good day. She sounded like her old self and was very happy. I get all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it.

*We told them we were getting married over the phone (long story), after only dating for 7 weeks. We owed them this one in person.
**In my excitement, I snapped the picture right before I actually said it. It still had the desired effect, but I didn't capture the moment like I'd intended.

Everything Happens for a Reason

2009-02-03T15:54:00.003-06:00

It is said that the first year of marriage is the hardest. Heh. The following list is from our first year of marriage. This is a list of The Lows (mostly).
2 weeks prior - my much loved mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer.
Month 1 - my sister has a baby girl, and Mom starts chemo and radiation.
Month 2 - my sister's baby starts her first 2 month hospital stay because she almost died and no one can figure out why.
Month 4 - we find out why: an extremely rare genetic metabolic disorder that is life threatening with no cure. Mom's cancer has metastasized to her brain, and she is given 3-6 months.
Months 4-24 - constantly worry that my sweet neice is going to up-and-die. (She's now 6.5 years old and doing reasonably well.)
Month 5 - Mom died. Cancer sucks at math.
Months 5 to present - G.R.I.E.F. It's not so all consuming now, but it was BAD for a while. I stayed Angry for a long time.
Months 5 to present – Baby Mama Drama. This is a recurring theme.
Month 12 - A natural disaster struck our house. No one was injured, but it was stressful and unpleasant to deal with on top of everything else.

Please rest assured that there were many highs too. Here's my favorite one: My mom danced at our wedding even though one year earlier MH and I weren’t even dating.

Needless to say, the TTC wasn't even thought about, much less commenced.

Also, I want to be clear about something - I am not infertile. I read a lot of IF blogs and have for quite some time. I think this is why I identify with those: I wanted a baby for so long, but wasn't sure that I'd ever have one of my own. It's still amazing to me that I am actually (finally) pregnant.

The Best Laid Plans

2009-02-03T12:55:00.020-06:00

MH and I met and became friends at work. When we met, I thought he was cute. I was otherwise involved. AND he had a SON - Squirt! At the time, that was a deal breaker for me. I was young and fresh out of college. I was not interested in raising someone else's child. Also: baby mama drama. No thanks.

Fast forward 2 years. MH and I had become better friends, and I had developed a little crush on him. Regardless of his having a child, I was smitten. I was still dating the guy from before. This guy excelled at being crappy. He reached a new pinnacle of crappiness when his unemployed lazy self refused to assist me in a medical emergency because he was sleeping. BYE - immediately! In a pain drug induced moment of brilliance, I told MH that I had broken it off with my boyfriend. It turns out that he was also smitten. We went on our first date 2 weeks later and were engaged less than 7 weeks after that (and married about 6 months after that).

Before there was even a prospective husband, my plan went like this: start trying for baby #1 after being married for 1 year. I had always wanted at least 2 and probably 3 kids. I have 3 siblings, and I love being part of a big family. Oh, and I'd like to be done having kids by 30, please.

MH's plan went like this: no more kids. He is an only child. When he was a very young man, his first wife abandoned him and their toddler. He had made many sacrifices for Squirt and because of him. He was less than willing to start anew.

Can you say Polar Opposites? We talked about this and came to a compromise BEFORE we got married. He had his reasons for feeling the way he felt, and I had mine. We both agreed to this: one additional child, sooner rather than later. Yep, that was the plan 6+ years ago.

Decisions, Decisions

2009-02-01T09:28:00.009-06:00

Welcome! There have been so many decisions to make that have led me here. By “here”, I mean pregnant. By “here”, I also mean blogging about my life, our lives. I hope to elaborate on some of those decisions here. I've never been a journaler. I make lists. Checking things off a list makes me happy. Now I can check "make a blog" off my list.

I am JP. My husband of 6+ years will be known as "My Honey" or "MH". Our teenage son will be "Squirt", a long time nickname of his. As of today, I am 5w3d LMP. I haven't decided on a blog name for baby. For now, I'll call the baby "Baby" (meant with utmost affection and adoration). We have out first ultrasound on February 9.

The main purpose of this blog is to have an external memory, but it will also serve as an outlet for me (see decisions above). When I was younger, I could remember EVERYTHING. My family called me "elephant brain". Now, not so much. I want to remember this pregnancy. I want to remember my thirties and beyond. Documenting things helps me remember.